Posted in Holiday, Tourist Attraction

Structural Integrity Gum

One of the worst situations one can run into while driving a camper is a bridge out. What makes it worse is a bridge out while it’s foggy. Even worse than that is a cow driving the camper while his hoofs are sticky because he decided to blow a giant bubble with his gum. The structural integrity of his bubble was on the shady side so, of course, it exploded everywhere.  Pure anxiety nightmare fuel.

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Well this isn’t good……

Before allowing Mr. C. Cow to attempt to turn an enormous camper around, in the fog, next to a bridge out, we had to pull over and deal with this tacky gum situation. Did you know that wet wipes aren’t ideal cleaning tools for gummy hoofs? They don’t work optimally unless you use an entire container of them.

(*Note To Self* Pick up more wet wipes and less gum.)

After we got Mr. C. all cleaned up it was time to maneuver a humongous recreation vehicle in a space the size of a compact car parking spot. I closed my eyes when he started backing up, turning a tiny bit, moving forward, and so forth for thirty minutes. I might have sweated out of my eyes a little due to how hot it was in the camper. (It wasn’t tears of fear! It was sweat I tell ya! SWEAT!!) Backwards. Turn a little bit. Forward then back again. When was this camper going to get turned around? Will we survive and not fall off the edge?

We survived. There would be no postcard if we hadn’t gotten turned around and went over the edge. Huzzah for living! Mr. C. Cow is an excellent backer upper who, after many years of practice (and a few run over fences) has excelled in his driving skills.

Thankfully, we were on our way down the road, away from the broken bridge and spooky fog. I’m grateful to Mr. C. for his driving but not too grateful for his bubble blowing skills. Maybe he should work on that.

“Tipsy” Cerulean

Photo Taken By Yours Truly In Second Life

Second Life Location: Silent Hill Experience Halloween Hunt (M)

The hunt is going on from now till November 1st.

 

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Posted in Holiday, Nature, Park, Tourist Attraction

Love Achieved

I know that many of you are asking “Well…what happened on Valentine’s Day?”. Another question is “Did Mr. C. Cow achieve a successful showing of love without making things explode?”. I would like to inform all of you that nothing exploded. For those of you that are disappointed in no detonations I would like to educate you with the knowledge that a marshmallow exploded in a microwave will not only increase in size but catch on fire. I would fill you in on the details of this mishap but it’s for another day. (Also…Mr. C. Cow is not over the trauma of combustible marshmallows.)

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No explosions here!

Everything went exceedingly well this year. I was majorly distressed that he might go overboard with such items as paper heart drops from the sky (paper cut danger zone), hiring a professional flame baton dancing ostrich (seriously….fire hazard), or going low-key (in his mind) and covering our equipment companies scissor lift in chocolate. My anxiety was not (finally) needed and things were fantastic.

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Beautiful Valentine’s Day Picnic Location!

There was a real picnic blanket that was not the sheet taken off of one of our beds. The only thing that was on fire was the spicy jalapeño appetizer Mr. C. Cow created. Instead of anything involving mayhem, explosions, and general confusion we were treated to wine, cheese, and an amazing view. Mr. C. Cow not only showed his love but he managed to show it successfully without any injury to individual or property. I call this a love win!

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Amazing View!

We shouldn’t take one day to show the love we have to others. As a family unit we tell each other each day that we care. Mr. C. Cow lets us know he is devoted to his clan by showing us an incredible day. No fires. No explosions to put out. No mess.

“Tipsy” Cerulean

Photos taken by moi in Second Life

Second Life Location: Rustic Retreat (M)

If you’re wondering the whole back story on how we got to this safe holiday point then please check out the two previous postcards: 

Mission: Love

It’s Go Time

 

Posted in Road

Alternate Transportation

You can’t drive a camper across a bridge if their isn’t a complete bridge. Campers cannot jump a bridge like some sort of action movie. They are too heavy and can’t drive fast enough.

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You would think that someone in the road construction business would put up more barriers then a sign informing us a few feet from the drop that the bridge is out. The lights on the sign weren’t blinking so that’s, clearly, a safety issue. We’re lucky that it wasn’t dark out!

The sign says that we can click for “Alternate Transportation”. Mr. C. Cow thought this meant that a GIANT BIRD would swoop down, pick up the camper, and safely put it on the other side. I just thought it would give you a map for a different route. I kinda like his creative transportation better.

Before backing the camper up to a safe distance where we could turn around (which happened to be, at least, two miles of driving backwards) Mr. C. Cow jumped out of the camper to check out the edge of the bridge. I’m not a fan of half crumbling bridges mixed with heights so I thought he was being a tad bit nuts. To satisfy his curiosity we took a picture of the edge of the bridge and one of him posing with a sign.

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I agree with the sign. I can’t look either. 

Lesson here? If you’re doing bridge work don’t put your safety signs right before a large drop into a body of water. Campers have brakes but they don’t stop on a dime.

“Tipsy” Cerulean

Location: Route 8 In Darvos (G)

Posted in Real Life

Chainsaw Arm Prohibited

In all of our travels we sometimes run into some really funny looking safety signs. Sometimes Mr. C. Cow and I like to guess what we think the signs are actually trying to tell us.

The other day, while visiting a place of industry, we took a bunch of pictures of the safety signs and thought we would try our hand at guessing them (completely wrong I might add).

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No Broadway Musical Numbers Allowed!

Clearly someone has been watching too many musicals and was inspired to sing and dance while operating machinery. Something this sign, clearly, states it doesn’t like. Party pooper!

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Do Not Limbo Under Forks!

Do Not Use Forklift For Step Exercises!

Staying healthy is important. Doing it on a forklift is not recommended. Limbo action should be done using the proper limbo equipment. If you want to do stair stepping exercises then use stairs.

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Your Arm Is Not A Chainsaw!

I know we’ve all seen someone’s groovy chainsaw arm in a movie before BUT this sign clearly states that we are not going to see it here. Just don’t do it!

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This one is super easy!

Danger! No Smoking While Dressed As Ziggy Stardust!

He played guitar he DID NOT smoke while in a work zone.

Someone should hire Mr. C. Cow and I to make safety signs. We could keep you safe from things like overcooked grilled cheese sandwiches and falling meatballs.

“Tipsy” Cerulean

Location: Somewhere In Virginia

In all seriousness….listen to safety signs and be safe people. Don’t be stupid!