Mr. C. Cow likes to refer to the month of October as “Free Candy Month”. Halloween only lasts one day but Mr. C. likes to dress up every day of the month and search out complimentary confections. So far he’s dressed up as a cheerleader, an astronaut, and a hoof model. (He just went around showing people his hoofs. I call it “costume cheating” he calls it “hoof model”.)
When one searches out freebie sweets it takes a lot of reading local newspapers and checking out social media for Halloween festivals, parties, and shindigs. While sipping his coffee, Mr. C. Cow found a haunted neighborhood trick or treat to check out. I, barely, got to drink a half a cup before he was mooing about how we needed “To get on the road and get that candy!”. I offered to buy him a candy bar at a gas station but was informed that was “missing the whole point of “Free Candy Month”!!! Can’t argue with that logic.
I have to admit that his zest for not paying for sweets isn’t without its hard work. Not only does he have to do the research to find candy locations there is much costume planning. (Today Mr. C. is dressed as a “Produce Stand Proprietor”.) If he was to apply this zest in other aspects of his life (sweeping the camper, finish his one cow play, etc.) then he would be unstoppable.
I’m hopeful that I can get him to only eat one free candy a day instead of an entire bag of candy corn. (Candy corn is not real corn!) Meh…what can you do? He’s happy, I’m happy to watch his happiness, and the costumes he comes up with are, admittedly, creative. Can’t wait to see what he wears tomorrow!
We hope that everyone had a wonderful Halloween this year!!
This year Mr. C. Cow and I decided not to wear matching costumes. Last year we went as salt and pepper. While I thought he was talking about the spices (I dressed up as a salt shaker) he showed up as some sort of pop/rap star thing. This year I came as a martini glass complete with a really nice olive hat I made myself. Mr. C. Cow showed up with a watermelon on his head. Ends up that it wasn’t on purpose as he was attempting to eat a watermelon and kinda got his head stuck in it. Instead of Moo-ing for help he made the best of his situation and chewed eye, nose, and mouth holes in the thing. When I asked him what he called his costume he said “Farmers Market Produce”. Not only is Mr. C. Cow always the cheerful one no matter what he sure is creative!
We hope that you all had a wonderful holiday filled with frights, chills, scares, and lots of free candy. You can’t go wrong with free candy!
Mr. C. Cow and I decided to take a night hike the other day. Try to find some nocturnal animals like an owl or two. Have a conversation with a bat. After this last night hike I have decided that Mr. C. Cow is no longer allowed to pick the path we take. At least until he figures out that not all paths are good paths.
You cannot, seriously, feel that walking down a path lined with nothing but forbidding darkness, a feeling of certain destruction, and some sort of weird crying statues is a good idea.
He was just humming away trying to do some sort of funky owl call (It mostly involved a lot of “Mooo Hooooo….Mooo Hooo” sounds. Do cow owls exist?). Having a grand old time. Not thinking about the fact that we were walking into some really scary looking places in the middle of nowhere.
I can understand how some people (and cows) can look at things and positively spin it no matter how it might look to others. What I can’t understand is how an individual (Mr. C. Cow in particular) can look at a path full of weeping, broken statues, and think it’s the best place to look for nocturnal animals that won’t try to eat you.
Halfway through our doom hike we came to a large body of water that was full of skeletons trying to get out. I’m running around in circles making an “Ahhh Ahh Ahhhhhh!!!!” sound while Mr. C. Cow pays them no mind. He just thinks the water got too cold to swim in so they were exiting to dry off.
The last straw in our hike of pure terror was when Mr. C. Cow stopped to ask a large sea creature for directions to the nearest snack bar. They were nice enough but it seemed to me that every time we turned around to look in the direction they were pointing a tentacle would attempt to grab us. Mr. C. Cow thought they just had a mind of their own. I just thought they had a mind to grab us and plunge us into an underwater grave.
Somehow, against all odds, we made it safely back to the camper. Somehow Mr. C. Cow was able to find a nice snack bar. I can appreciate someone who sees the glass as half full but his chipper optimism sometimes borders on dangerous. Next time we go on a hike I’m picking the trail.
Mr. C. Cow and I were driving around looking at the fall foliage when we had this sudden urge to eat cupcakes. We’re not exactly sure how or if looking at autumn colors has anything do with cupcakes. Mr. C. Cow said looking makes you hungry for something pretty. I’ll go with his explanation.
We stopped in a small town that looked like it would have one of those fancy cupcake shops and realized that every single resident was a skeleton.
Not only were they skeletons but they didn’t seem to have a shop that sold cupcakes.
WHAT KIND OF MONSTER TOWN WAS THIS THAT DIDN’T HAVE A CUPCAKE STORE!!??
Right then and there Mr. C. Cow fainted. It wasn’t because the town was inhabited by skeleton people. It wasn’t because there seemed to be skeletons coming out of the road. It wasn’t because there was a skeleton that was stuck up in a tree. (I’m assuming that he ended up there by the bird next to him. Hope he’s ok. I tried poking him with a stick but he was stuck up there pretty good.)
Mr. C. Cow fainted because there wasn’t a single cupcake to be found. No store with cupcakes. Not even the public market seemed to carry any. I quickly got him awake by waving a store bought baked good under his nose. Don’t worry as he was shaken up but fine.
Using my awesome powers of coming up with the most reasonable explanation I decided no cupcakes were the reason the entire town was full of skeletons. No cupcakes means that everyone just kinda wasted away into nothing. Who says that baked goods don’t save lives? Nobody. That’s who!
I safely got Mr. C. Cow into the camper, gave him a cookie I found in a cupboard, and proceeded to drive him to the nearest town with a cupcake store. I hope he never has to suffer a bake good related fainting ever again!
I’m trying to figure out a few things today as I write this postcard to you. How does one exactly ride a horse without a head? I mean…you kinda need your head for various things. Brain container. Holder of the eyeballs. The place where your nose goes. Your head is a very important thing.
We were taking a scenic drive through a rural area to check out covered bridges and old barns. Mr. C. Cow has a thing for antique barns. While checking out one particular barn we ran into a gentleman on horseback that didn’t seem to have a head. He waved some sort of sword around and held a lit up pumpkin in his other hand. It was all sorts of dramatic. Then he, safely, rode his horse out.
I think that it has to take one of great skill to ride a horse safely out of a barn when you can’t see. Mr. C. Cow would also like to know what kind of contacts the horse had because, as you can see, the eyes were glowing red. I think Mr. C. Cow is considering a CowPire costume for Halloween this year and the glowing red eyes would be a nice touch. Finding cow vampire fangs is a whole different thing.
As we continued on we, once again, found Mr. Headless Horse Rider doing laps around the covered bridge we wanted to cross. I mean…seriously…how can he see where he is going? Is he pulling his shirt up above his head and peeking through the button holes of his shirt?Is it actually just a guy on the sidelines with a remote control and a headless robot? How can you breath? I think, personally, that it’s kinda rude to do laps around a bridge that people are trying to cross. Not to mention dangerous with the limited vision and water below aspect.
Besides the weird horse rider we had a splendid time checking out various covered bridges and antique barns. We even saw a tree that looked like some sort of glowing face.
I hope that the guy on the horse was practicing some sort of act for a show because, if he was doing it on his own, he was just weird.
We decided to treat ourselves today by stopping at a fancy hotel. Something that involved cocktails in real glassware and the opportunity to not have to cook for ourselves. Living in the camper is fun but sometimes you want to be able to sleep in a real bed.
We found a lovely hotel on the top of a hill that didn’t seem to be too busy. I let Mr. C. Cow practice his camper backing up skills since there were no other cars in the parking lot. It’s kinda hard to explain to a police officer why a cow backed into a parked car even though he has a drivers license.
Check in was uneventful except I do feel that our host was a tad bit on the quiet side. Might be from the red barn he was painting judging from the red paint covering his body. The cocktail bar was very nice and they seemed to have some sort of parfait that looked like real eyeballs. My hats off to the chef for making something look so realistic! I just stuck to a martini. I am assuming that Tuesdays are bears drink half off because the entire place was full of bears. I wonder if they have half off otter happy hour.
The room was comfortable enough but we kept hearing weird noises coming from the rooms around us. Other then that and the some weird tentacle’d guest hanging out in the hallways it was nice to sleep in a real bed for a change.
Sometimes an otter just needs to get out from behind the wheel and sleep in sheets not laundered by a cow.