Posted in Food, Nature, Park, Tourist Attraction

The Ballad Of Five Pounds

Mr. C. Cow and I went on a hike today. It started out as any of our typical hikes because Mr. C. wanted to pack WAY TOO MUCH trail mix than was needed. Ten pounds of trail mix is a bit much for the two of us to eat on a two-mile hike. He insisted that we might run into woodland creatures in desperate need of a mixture of cereal, nuts, and chocolate candies. Even helping others doesn’t justify carrying ten pounds around. We settled on five.

Let me break down what happened to each individual pound of trail mix. This is where they typical just gets weird.

Pound #1: We made it, about, 50 yards when it was time to stop for a trail mix break. We split the first pound but I think that Mr. C. Cow got more chocolate candies in his half then I did. I swear that a half a pound would at least yield more than three pieces.

Pound #2: This pound was thrown on the ground. No! Not randomly thrown on the ground! It was thrown on the ground for the birds flying by. Thrown on the ground for a pack of butterflies. Individual pieces were handed out to tiny bugs that were just passing through. I saw a beetle sneak off with at least five large pieces on his back. As of this very moment no bugs, butterflies, or birds are without trail mix in the woods today.

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Even Butterflies Like Trail Mix!

Pound #3: Mr. C. Cow ate the whole pound by himself. How do I know this? I know this because he went behind a tree to do “his private business” and came back a pound lighter in the trail mix department. I guess that “private business” means different things to both of us.

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Not Pictured: Mr. C. Cow Crunch Munching Behind A Tree.

Pound #4: This pound went to a good cause. It was given to a mother bear and her two cubs who looked extra hungry when they spotted us. Mr. C. Cow was more than willing to share this special pound #4. He says it’s because he’s the giving type but I, personally, think Mr. C. just thought they were going to eat us. I don’t disagree with him.

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Um…Yeah…I Just Want Your Trail Mix….

Pound #5: By the time we got down to our last pound we still had a mile and a half left in our two-mile hike. Mr. C. Cow was so full he was starting to roll down the hiking trail rather than walking on it. I had already eaten a half a pound and was not about to eat any more. An otter lady sometimes needs to watch her figure and eating that much food, kinda, defeats the whole purpose of hiking. Just as we were getting to the point where I wasn’t sure how I was going to roll Mr. C. Cow back to the camper a horse named “Danny” trotted up and offered to help me out of my trail mix debacle. Between the both of us we were able to, safely, roll Mr. C. Cow back to the camper.

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Hi! I’m Danny! 

Let this be a lesson to all of you who feel the need to take ten pounds of trail mix hiking and compromise by only taking five. Five…is a bit much for walking two miles. Take what you need and maybe an apple to balance it all out. You don’t want to find yourself in the woods with a mile and a half to go and can no longer walk. Being rolled out of the woods is a bit embarrassing if you think about it.

Don’t embarrass yourself. Eat an apple instead.

“Tipsy” Cerulean

All photos taken in Second Life by…me!

Second Life Location: Yosemite Valley (M) 

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Posted in Musuem, Nature, Park, Tourist Attraction

Emergency Banana

Mr. C. Cow and I have a friend named Terry. He’s a professional body building Triceratops. Terry likes to work on his triceps so I guess he’s more of a triceps-atops. Great guy though a little prone to constantly wanting to impress you with his bench pressing skills. Mr. C. Cow can run the mile like he was some sort of sonic super bovine. I can stare at a chin up bar and try to will myself tall enough to reach it.

We visited with Terry for a while he was training for a triathlon. When we were about to leave we asked him about an abandoned medical facility on the other side of town. People seemed to have this thing about exploring abandoned places and taking pictures. Mr. C. Cow and I thought it would be kinda neat to do the same. Terry was ADAMANT that we not go to that area of town. He said weird things had happened at the facility when it was open. Between the crime in the area as well as rumors of experiments lurking around it was fenced off to protect the general public.

Poo Poo to rumors and what not!

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We REALLY should have listened to Terry. Five minutes into checking the place out we were accosted by a dinosaur who tried to hold us up at claw point for my purse. Lucky for us I don’t carry a purse. The crazed dino thief was at a loss as to what to do next since I don’t carry a purse. In a moment of sheer panic I threw a banana I had with me at him thinking it would help. Dino thief took the banana and ran off. As he ran off a very large dinosaur came out of nowhere and stole the banana. Dino thief jumped the large dinosaur and started chewing on his back-end. One of the thieves friends came out of nowhere and joined in on the fight. Mr. C. Cow started humming a song from “West Side Story”. I thought it was a better idea if we left. Don’t want to lose one of my weeny otter arms by getting in the middle of a banana fight.

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There is a moral to the story in this somewhere. I’m thinking it’s to always listen to your body building friend when he warns you to not go someplace. Mr. C. Cow thinks we were taught to always carry a banana around in case of emergency.

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“Tipsy” Cerulean

Location: Nargus Lab (M)

Posted in Uncategorized

High Knee Lift Step

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We’ve been driving for hours now on a dirt path and I’m starting to get a little bit cranky. The only radio station we can seem to get only plays marching band music and my butt cheeks have fallen asleep. It was time to catch a little fresh air, tell my butt to wake up, and try to put on a happy face.

As if the world was trying to give me a friendly hug we, amazingly, came across a beautiful park that offered us coffee, friendly conversation, and no marching bands. We parked right next to the welcome sign and had a lovely conversation with Sid and Zelda the welcome committee birds. Zelda was a bit of a gossip when it came to discussing bird migration stories but Sid was nothing but the perfect gentleman. Or is that “gentlebird”?

There was a small cafe that offered coffee and pastries for the weary traveler. I was actually able to order my “Half Cap Full Latte Side Foam All Foam No Foam Foaming At The Mouth Skim Milk Decaf Mocha Minus The Mocha Put It In A Travel Mug” coffee. It’s been so long since I’ve had one that I was starting to worry that I would never have it again!

I’m really glad that we found this little stop as it sure made me one happy traveler again. As we waved goodbye to the welcoming birds we set on off once again. Hopefully we’ll find a station that doesn’t just play marching band music.

“Tipsy” Cerulean 

Location: Calas Galadhon (M)

Posted in Nature, Park

Fire Danger Levels

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After leaving the Route 11 Rest Area I needed to find a place to stop for the night. I ended up finding a lovely little national park where I could just park the camper and sleep for the night. It’s hard work driving a giant camper when you have tiny little weeny otter arms.

This morning, before leaving, I decided to check the fire danger sign to see what the odds were of a potential forest fire. They were low so I’m feeling a tad bit safer driving through any wooded areas. The ranger bear was lovely to talk to although I’m not sure if he is a real ranger or just ate one and stole the hat.

“Tipsy” Cerulean

Location:  Prim River National Forest (M)